After my morning spent mourning my badly butchered vegetable garden, I was trying to channel that loss into some real feeling to put in my Grapes of Wrath audition at Zach Scott. I’d worked so hard and spent tons of time and money on that garden, and now it was all gone. THEY EVEN ATE THE CILANTRO. YOU AREN’T SUPPOSED TO LIKE HERBS, DEER. YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO LEAVE HERBS ALONE. Little did I know that the trials of the day were far from over. On my way to the theater for the audition I took the exit off mopac that leads past Zilker, just to find it blocked off for the Christmas lights in the park thing. Its a total madhouse with a huge line of cars with their blinkers on and families walking down to the park holding hands. I am supposed to be at the audition in 20 minutes. Thinking there was no way I could possibly make it I decide to turn around and get back on mopac and take the next exit instead. On my way up the service road, my car did this cute thing it does when its got a quarter of a tank of gas and its on an incline. It stopped running. And there’s another cute thing about my car, the hazards don’t work. I called B and he said he was on his way. I sat there waiting and cried a little. Just a little.
I did eventually get to the audition. B came to my rescue and we switched cars. I still didn’t get there until after 6 and my audition was at 4:40. They were really nice about it and I think I still did okay but I was definitely not in the place I’d ideally hoped to be for it. Maybe it worked for me. I don’t have any sort of clearheaded perspective on it, I’m still sort of a wreck. But I do have a new respect for the characters that feels like its physically in my body. Today, I had a little taste of the Joad experience, and it was a beatdown.